The Biggest Barriers To Overcome In Your Relationship

Australian couples who are struggling with their relationship seem to all be affected by the same barrier: Communication. If you fail in this area, your relationship can break down over time and eventually lead to splitting or divorce.

Here is how the lack of effective communicatin can lead to huge barriers in your relationship. The only way to overcome these barriers is to learn how to better communicate – often successfully achieved by visiting professional couples counselling.

What is Communication?

Ask yourself, are you communicating according to what psychologists deem appropriate? In other words, are you talking to your partner on a deeper level other than the basic day-to-day dialogue? Are you even properly listening to them – and vice versa? Do you feel comfortable to express your emotional self openly and safely; and conversely, do you allow for your partner to have the space to communicate his or her emotions without rebuttal? 

What should you be concerned about regarding ineffective communication? 

• Resentment or Contempt

When a lack of communication builds in a relationship, one partner (or both) may begin to build up a sense of resentment for the other since none of their feelings and needs are being heard.

When someone is constantly let down or unheard, a great deal of resentment will build up and eventually a sense of contempt will begin to brew. Once this begins, there’s usually no hope for the relationship without immediate professional help, and of course a willingness to repair.

• Interrupted Intimacy

Remember that the less and less you communicate your feelings and emotions effectively and in a trusting environment, the more your relationship will suffer when it comes to intimacy. Without that natural intimacy only you and your partner can express, a degradation of the core of your human needs will be left unfed, unsatisfied and unappreciated.

• Impregnable Wall

As the all-important communication between you and your partner begin to dwindle, the more you may begin to build up a wall, brick by brick. This usually comes into play when you are tired of the insults, the accusations, the fights and above all, the miscommunication.

Eventually, this wall will become so fortified and large that no attempt from your partner to communicate gently or lovingly will ever make its way through. This wall of defence is your natural way of protecting yourself from the pain. It’s easier “not to hear” than to deal with the problems at hand. However, this will ultimately destroy your relationship.

Now that you understand the forces that may prevent you and your partner from enjoying a life of healthy interaction, you should try to focus on breaking away the walls of silence and gently introduce these new ways of communicating. Even the Victoria State Government for Better Health agrees that communication is central to a healthy relationship.

You can also seek professional help where you can have a mediator to allow you to speak in a safe environment, helping both you and your partner to rediscover your communication skills.

Is a lack of communication breaking down your relationship? Do you feel you need to take action? Feel free to give us a call anytime to discuss support options.

Related Tags: Psychologists Melbourne | Couples Counselling Melbourne